Empty Nest Leadership: When Life and Leadership Shift
Leadership doesn’t happen in a vacuum. Who we are at home shapes who we are at work, and vice versa. Right now, my wife and I are entering a new season that many of you may know well: the slow march toward an empty nest.
We’re not fully there yet—our youngest of ten is a high school senior—but the departures have been steady. Three are in college, another just graduated, two are moving across the country, others are finding their way in careers and life. For years, our house was full of noise, projects, dances, broken bones, breakfasts, and late-night laughter, soo much laughter.
Now? The house is quieter. We’ve downsized. My commute is longer, and with that comes more time to think. Sometimes too much. I find myself craving the chaos we used to juggle, even as I celebrate the independence of our kids. And it makes me ask: what does leadership look like in this season?
Leadership Shaped by Parenthood
For years, our children were part of the schools we led. They tagged along to games, sat through events, even grew up in the hallways we worked in. They gave me perspective. They reminded me that leadership is about the little things—presence, patience, laughter and modeling growth.
But as they’ve launched, I’ve noticed the sidelines are emptier. The rush is gone. The leadership lens shifts again.
The Empty Nest Paradox
Here’s the paradox: the time we always longed for—quiet nights, unhurried mornings( well some mornings), adult conversation—is finally here. And it’s beautiful. But it’s also unsettling, and sometimes lonely. Leadership requires energy and connection. For decades, so much of mine was fueled by raising kids alongside leading schools. Now, there’s space. And that space demands redefining purpose.
Three Truths of Empty Nest Leadership?
We grieve while we grow. Missing the chaos doesn’t mean we don’t celebrate independence. The grief gives us empathy.
We gain margin. With fewer family obligations, there’s more capacity for mentoring, visioning, and deep professional growth.
We redefine purpose. Just as our homes evolve, our “why” as leaders must evolve, too.
Leading Into What’s Next
No one prepares leaders for this stage. We talk about burnout and succession, but not about the personal transitions that reshape how we lead. Maybe the best thing we can do is:
Acknowledge the loss. It’s real, and it’s okay to feel it. I know I do.
Harness the margin. Invest that reclaimed time into people and passions.
Invite community. Leadership doesn’t have to be lonely—especially in transition.
An Invitation
I wonder if this resonates with anyone else. Have you found yourself in this in-between space—balancing nostalgia with new opportunities? How has it shaped your leadership?
Empty nest leadership isn’t about endings. It’s about beginnings. And like every season, it calls us to reflect, reimagine, and grow.
Kristina MacBury, Almost Empty-nester Principal